An alternate title of this post could be “Choosing your wedding theme,” but I hate using the word theme in weddings. That makes it sound like a kids party. So, I go with style. Style can mean a lot of different things: color choice, time of year, formality, etc. With that many ways to look at things, how do you decide on one?
I tend to think that a wedding’s style should always come from the couple’s personality. Letting their personality flow through the wedding’s style choices is always best. I have seen it many different ways: the mother of the bride decides everything and ends up with a wedding of her style, the bride decides everything according to her taste and ends up with a girly or cutesy wedding (the worst in my opinion) or the mother of the bride (who is paying for everything) and the bride don’t agree and get a wedding that looks pieced together.
So, my first piece of advice is to think of your wedding in terms of we and us. Even if you and your fiance don’t agree much on style, you can make a cohesive wedding that will reflect you as a couple. Brides, just try not to be the diva on everything. I promise that you will be the center of attention that day. You can compromise on a few things if you have to. And honestly, I wouldn’t even want to be a guest of a wedding where a bride has made it ALL about her (think princess weddings – ick). I like to celebrate the couple, not the bride’s overbearing personality.
As a side thought, I can appreciate a feminine tune to a wedding. I mean, it’s a wedding for pity’s sake! I don’t hate pink. I just hate things to be overdone, especially when it is done in a cutesy way.
We have established that it is personality that brings the wedding style. So, now what? Well, what kind of couple are you? Outdoorsy? Metro? Beach? Casual? Formal? Use things like that to pull together an overall tone to the wedding.
Now, start to think about how you and your fiance would want to entertain. Don’t think on wedding terms. Think in overall general ways, how do you like to have your guests over? Are you more intimate – small groups? Are you lavish – upscale dining or a swanky cocktail spot? Do you enjoy being outside – maybe a garden party?
Once you have started to think in these terms, you are well on your way to knowing your wedding style. It is such a disappointment when I meet with a bride and she has already picked her colors with out even knowing where the wedding will be held. That is doing things in an opposite way. And it usually ends up being reflected in the end product.
Again, speaking with a planner before you go making these style decisions can help you ENORMOUSLY. Don’t pin yourself into one track before you know where that track is going.